Patience

It took me 8 months to lose 100lbs in 2010.  That is really fast when you think about it but it actually took complete commitment day after day without any overnight changes.  I could see over time the improvements in the mirror and I could definitely feel them over time but it took commitment over time.

That is an important thing to remember at this point in my life for a few reasons.  I have begun to experience the change of heart I sought months ago and it came as an answer to fervent prayer about a totally different issue.  I have felt, maybe for the first time, the difference between having a testimony and being converted, being a true disciple or follower of Jesus Christ.  I have had to come to the realization that before I can ever know what God wants me to with my life, I need to become who God wants me to become.  I need to love sincerely, give completely, and be fully committed to keeping the commandments.  I have always felt God's love for me, but I want Him to trust me.  To speak to me and allow me to be His hands to serve and give.  He, I am learning, is quick to love but he meters His trust a little at a time as we prove our willingness to commit over time.  The biggest challenge right now is just knowing what His Will is.  I try to listen for the spirit, to pay attention to the feelings in my heart, but it is not easy.  I think Pres. Monson is a great example of how to get better at this.  Whenever he feels prompted, he goes and does...no waiting or thinking, just acting.   I have a long ways to go in that regard but I am committed.

I also have the challenge that my knee is still full of pain.   It is my fault, it was getting stronger and after our Ragnar race, I pushed a little too hard and hurt it again and then I haven't done anything since.

For once in my life, I am excited to get my physical, spiritual, and temporal healthy all at the same time.  That might be harder than I know with all the challenges at work, but that is a post for another day.